Nicola Sturgeon calls for Independence for Fish (Scottish fish)

In a recent announcement, a furious Nicola Sturgeon has called for justice after she has learned that no Scottish Fish were eligible to vote in the recent EU referendum. Recent polls suggest that whilst most Carp and Trout would prefer to leave the European Union, Sturgeon, Cod and Haddock would likely have voted to remain. She is now in talks with Brussels and demands that the rights of all Scottish fish be respected.